"A Beautiful State"
Within the experience of a restless body and mind, I looked to the internet for a source of encouragement. YouTube, in particular, has become a priceless resource to me as one who battles within herself, struggling to find motivation and contentment. Over a few years’ time, I have become endeared to numerous speakers who I have discovered there.
I sat down at the Masonite work desk in my studio. I took out my letter-sized pad of isometric-grid paper. With a subtle haze of sadness, I began to browse my phone. The video I chose was by Tony Robbins, a leader in life-coaching. The video was titled, “Tony Robbins: HOW TO BE HAPPY EVERYDAY (powerful speech).”
I picked up my pencil and began to draw. My hand searched, clumsily, for the personality of this new work. I took in and reflected on the words that were entering my ears. Tony proposed that persons may step into the conviction that, “Life is too short to suffer. I’m going to find ecstasy in every moment.” He emphasized the preciousness of life as he urged listeners to make the choice that they will live each day in “a beautiful state.”
“A beautiful state,” I pondered.
I achieved connection with the paper before me as my awareness moved into a sort of non-verbal, contemplative atmosphere. Vapors moved about in the room of my mind, forming abstract questions such as, “What does my own beautiful state look like?” and, “How does it feel in my body?” My considerations manifested as intuitive motions while my marks orchestrated their searching dialogue.
In this artwork, I imagine that which I long for - that I would develop a practice of peace that is independent of my circumstances. I illustrate myself attempting to sort the objects of my incessant mental activity. Just beyond, I think I see a mist of quiet space. I reach for it, wrestling to push through the assault of this buzzing clutter.
Is a person such as myself truly free to choose residence in the vast sky of stillness? In moments of higher consciousness, I seek entry.